Mina was exhausted, she wanted to take a break from life.
She was tired of listening to the constant pitying whispers coming from her classmates.
She was tired of worrying her friends and especially Kami who had been feeding her candies to keep her thoughts off the breakup.
Kami had hoped that the sugar rush would put some life back into her friend but only gave her a stomach ache in the end.
"Can you take some notes for me? I'm going to the infirmary." asked Mina to her friend.
"I can come with you if you want!"
"No I'm fine..."
Mina could feel the heavy and almost predator like gaze of her male classmates on her back.
That's all she was to them, a piece of meat back on the market.
She missed Minhyun, and especially the Minhyun that had always protected her from them.
"Mina-" Called out a boy before being stopped by Kami.
"Tututut sit down. She can go there alone."
"No but." said Kami, winking at her friend.
"Thank you." whispered Mina before leaving the classroom.
There was finally some silence in her life.
The hallways were empty and only the sound of her steps could be heard.
She stopped by a window and stared at the blue sky,wondering what would happen now.
Minhyun had been perfect for her, he was a safe person able to help her achieve a safe life.
Or so she thought.
Mina barely remembered her father's face but clearly remembered his voice that always screamed at her mother. She remembered their last argument before he left her and her pregnant mother forever.
She remembered her mother often hugging her and crying as she held a newborn baby brother in her arms.
She may have been two then but had never forgot what it meant to be abandoned.
She had tried to be a perfect sister,daughter and girlfriend to never be abandoned, all for nothing.
She had lost Minhyun.
She felt empty.
Mina entered the nurse's office and noticed her absence.
A sigh escaped her as she opened a curtain only to see a sleepy Myungsoo laying on the bed.
"Myungsoo?" called out Mina as the president opened his eyes and rose up.
"Mina? What's wrong?"
"Stomachache and you?"
"Headache." growled the young man.
"Ah~So even the great and scary Myungsoo is a victim of his human condition~"
Mina laughed and sat next to him.
"That's what others think, not me." smiled Mina
"And what do you think about me?"
"....I thought that you were angry at me."
Myungsoo took her hand.
"I am just glad to have you back! You are the best thing that happened to me this year."
"...You never lost me."
Mina smiled and realized how big his hand had become since the time they used to play together.
He was almost an adult and would graduate in less than a year.
He would go away again.
"Then what are we now? Are we childhood friends again or just highschool friends?"
Mina blinked a few times before eyeing him.
"Ah…? What then?"
"Nothing…?" asked a hurt Mina, before standing up again. "...I see, sorry."
Maybe she had been wrong to think that things had gone back to the way they were.
Maybe she had been the only one liking being able to spend time with him.
Myungsoo grabbed her wrist and brought her to him as she was about to leave his side, stopping a few inches away from her face.
"I don't want you to misinterpret things again."
"...You were clear enough in what you meant I think." whispered a confused Mina. "I won't bother you again if I truly am nothing to you."
"But you did misinterpret me." sighed Myungsoo before brushing her cheek with his hand. "I didn't meant that you did not matter to me with these words."
"You aren't just a friend...You are more."
A disappointed and painful laugh escaped his lips before sighing and running a hand in his hair.
"..That's what you want? Do you want me to be a big brother figure to you?"
Mina was confused, what did he meant to be to her then?
"..Forget it, it doesn't matter anymore."
"It does! Tell me."
"...Can't you see?" asked Myungsoo in a whisper
Mina eyed how tensed he was, how pink his cheeks had become, how his fingers had sled down to her lips. She felt his hand on her waist and could feel his pulse.
His heart was racing.
"...No way." blushed the young woman.
"I love you. I have for years."
Mina was confused.
"...Is this a joke?"
"No it isn't."
Mina sat back down on the bed in disbelief.
Kim Myungsoo,Kim Myungsoo loved her.
Kim Myungsoo the always so perfect and handsome school president was in love with her.
"...I never knew."
"I know." said Myungsoo "But I tried to tell you…"
A sad smile graced his lips , making Mina think about the letters.
"...Then the letters were…"
"All of them..?"
"All of them."
Mina felt hot, just as if she had a fever.
"...I...I don't know what to say...I just broke up with Minhyun and -"
"I'm not asking you to go out with me...I just wanted you to know that things have changed in a way. We can't just go back to the way we were when we were in elementary school."
"Then...Will I lose you if I never like you the way you like me?"
"You won't. But you can't expect me to sleep over in your bed like last time."
Mina blushed more, what had he thought that night? What was he thinking when she was sleeping in his arms?
Her heart was racing.
" I don't know…" replied the girl.
"...I'm scared Myungsoo."
"Of everything, everything is changing around me and it terrifies me." whispered Mina. " My mom is always abroad now, Junho doesn't need me anymore, I broke up with Minhyun, Minju will be less and less present since she is dating Yohan and now even you...You and your feelings."
Myungsoo leaned in and kissed her cheek.
" You'll be alright."
"How can you know…?"
"Because I will be there for you, always."
"...If there is something that I don't believe in it is the notion of something eternal." sadly smiled Mina. "You'll stop loving me one day."
Myungsoo played with her hand.
"Maybe...But you know...I have loved you for most of my life. Always, every day." smiled the school president." I've grown so used to it that I don't think I will ever stop."
Mina felt her eyes fill up with tears.
"I'm sorry...Why...I don't understand how and why you love someone like me."
"There is no reason...Don't cry ok?" smiled Myungsoo. " I just love the person you are and you are beautiful but so much more inside."
"...I'm not rejecting you, I just...I just have to deal with some issues before thinking about it a..and then I'll see." sighed Mina. "I never saw you this way before after all… I need some time."
"You can have all the time you need." smiled Myungsoo
Mina wiped her tears and looked at him.
"So you'll wait for me…? Even if I do not chose you in the end..?"
"....There is no always." sadly smiled Mina.
"There is for me, you are my always." whispered Myungsoo. " You have always been."
CommentairesSuivre le flux RSS des commentaires
Ajouter un commentaire